NOBODY should ever, for any reason buy, sell, trade, pawn or otherwise associate with any sort of fun fur novelty yarn. Seriously, I am absolutely sick of seeing patterns featuring fun fur. I just sifted through no less than 75 knitting patterns trying to find SOMETHING that is relatively easy to knit (preferably not a scarf or hat or mittens, since I live in the desert and it’s April.) and at least half of these patterns are made featuring fun fur. WHO THE FUCK USES THIS SHIT!

Ack. Seriously.

There is not a lot to report other than: I LEARNED TO DO CABLES! I finally, after making row after row after row of knots, landed on the proper way to turn regular knit stitches into beautifully braided cables. Oh, what joy to use that gorgeous double pointed needle! I love, love, love it! I taught myself to do cables about fifteen minutes after I taught myself to purl properly. Previous to these needle craft revelations I was only capable of a very basic and often times lumpy garter stitch. I had the wonky long, loose stitch at one end of each row and sometimes my rows were identical on both sides, and sometimes I would have two or three rows of stockinette and then more lumps and bumps. But now, oh yes now, now I have beautiful patterns and repititions of the stitches I am actually INTENDING to do. My little heart swells at the thought. I guess I am more accomplished at the ripe old age of 25 than I originally thought, because 24 has not been a waste, I am richer by two dogs and now posses the knowing hands capable of knitting properly.  My life may not be complete, but it is certainly more interesting.

So, time marches on and I’m actually getting sort of excited about my birthday, that happens to fall on  Friday for the first time since I’ve been of legal age. My 21st fell on Easter Sunday, and it’s been pretty steadily down hill since then. However, this year it falls on a Friday, and I am not at a conference for the Honor Society, I am not at work, I am not new in a town full of strangers and it’s not any major holiday. This year, I have the day of and the next day off, I have money in the bank, I have friends with whom I will be celebrating, and most importantly I have zero expectations and all I really want out of the day is to NOT GO TO WORK FOR ANY REASON. And as luck would have it, I do the schedule, so I get to do just that. All is well.

I am enjoying a foofy cocktail, and I will be watching a new episode of House shortly. Tomorrow I need to mail off a package to a swap partner for Craftster, then I have some math homework to do. Thursday afternoon I think Mike and I are going to catch a matinee of the Aqua Teen movie and of course, snuggle down for the night to watch Greys Anatomy and Ugly Betty. Since my social life basically revolves around the television that is the extent of my week. Except of course continuing work on some new swap items for a different swap partner, and working on the bag I’m making Phylicia (one of my employees/friends.)

The wound on my hand is healing nicely, I am officially free to knit and crochet again (obviously) so that’s good. And, of course, I  was able to go back to work, though admittedly I would have rather to forgo work and go straight into days on end of crafting.

So we’ve put down our registration fee for the Knit n’ Stitch cruise in September, but we’re on the waiting list because it was booked up, but we’re third on the list, so hopefully we’ll get on. I’m super excited about it, though if we don’t get to go, I’m going to roll the money that I’ve saved over to try to take one of the overseas knitting trips I’ve seen advertised (like Debbie Stollers trip to TUSCANY! Ye, Gods, I wish I had known about that a few months ago so I could have started saving earlier.)

Dinner is on, so I’m off.

Seriously. For the third time now I have left my ATM card in the ATM and driven away. I am an idiot.

Ack.

I think so.  So yesterday, in the middle of the first morning rush (about 7 a.m.)  I was slicing a bagel to put in the toaster, and while I was sawing through the rough sesame bagel I sliced my left palm, deep. I, like the idiot I am, just put some neosporin an a Band-Aid on it and didn’t go to the hospital until after 2 p.m. when I got off work. I wasn’t going to go at all, except the damn thing wouldn’t quit bleeding, and I usually clot pretty quickly. I know I clot fairly quickly because I tend to cut, scrape and other wise harm myself on a fairly regular basis. Anyway, so when I got off work I butterflied it close and went to the ER. It wasn’t too bad until they soaked it to disinfect it and then the evil doctor (also acting in league with the Devil) pried it open with his cloven hooves and stuck the liquid of a thousand burning souls in it. Then it hurt. Turns out I nicked a vein, which explains why I wouldn’t stop bleeding. So they super glued it back together, slapped a big bulky bandage on it and sent me on my way. When I was getting the discharge instructions from the nurse, she was going over the list of things I couldn’t do. I was fine with “no work, no dishes, no heavy lifting” etc, but then this crazy bitch told me I couldn’t knit or crochet for THREE TO FIVE DAYS! What the HELL am I supposed to do with myself? The cut is on my left palm at the place where my wrist connects to my thumb, so somehow I’m supposed to keep my thumb immobile for three days so it can start putting itself back together.

People who know me, know anything about me, know how hard it is for me to simply hold stiff for any length time. Holding still for 10 minutes is tough for me, three days is unbearable.  Technically I’m not supposed to be typing, but I’ve figured out how to type without using my left thumb. Thank God, it wasn’t my right hand. 

The only problem I’m really having with this ’ no left thumb’ thing is picking stuff up, and zipping my pants. So, for right now I’m sticking to pajama or yoga pants and I make someone else pick stuff up. Which doesn’t always work, but I think I’m going to work on teaching the dogs to fetch things for me.

Well, I’m off to watch the History channel for the next three days.

NOTE: This is an old post from this blog before I migrated to a new version. These are all old projects, I am just now moving stuff over to this version.

I finally finished something that can pass for wearable in polite society!

This is the ‘Knot Ugly’ shrug pattern from Stitch n’ Bitch Happy Hooker. I’m not sure I’ll actually wear it because the whole shrug trend really isn’t my style, but I wanted to know I could make something wearable and follow a pattern start to finish. This is a fairly easy pattern to follow and it works up very quickly. I’m going to modify this same pattern to make a cardigan.

Here are some of the embroidery projects I’ve done:

This is a white wife beater tank top with a coffee cup and “love” underneath.

This is a skull with a flower (I don’t like the flower) and ‘True Love’ underneath.

This was my first attempt at embroidery. It’s a tea towel and a ball of yarn. All of these are from the Sublime Stitching patterns. (www.sublimestitching.com)

Next I’m going to conquer the world of sewing. We’ll see how that goes.